How do I stop letting this parasocial relationship ruin my mental health?

sorry if this is not the place to post this but I felt it is at least important enough to try. This subreddit not too long ago became super dead. With most of kpop reddit being filled with negativity, kpop fans thinking they are too cool to like kpop or admit it is good, fanwars and so much more, this subreddit felt like one of the only places where people actually shared their love for kpop. Finding and exploring kpop in many ways can be harder than finding any other music. If you go to review and rating websites like rateyourmusic, kpop is generally always heavily biased against and rated lower than it should be, thus making it hard to find and trust these ratings (also they always say kpop songs are the wrong genres). Most of the talk online surrounds title tracks and if your looking to find a certain type of song that isn't really in any title tracks or just want a bside rec, there is a good chance you are just plain out of luck. For many people, this sub is their only hope. Sure, you can ask for some recs here, but we all know this isn't what this sub is really for and this kind of thing deserves it's own sub. submitted by /u/SnooOranges829 [link] [comments]

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This will probably get me roasted to boot, but I feel like kpop fans aren’t used to seeing idols that are ‘plus sized’ or even… normal sized? And I’ve been seeing so many videos, posts, and comments pertaining to a certain idol (others as well of course) looking ‘amazing’, ‘finally dressed right’, ‘so beautiful’, etc. when they have clearly lost/are actively losing weight - that’s good!! I think it’s great to cheer idols on that might be going through something especially being in the spotlight like that. But I feel like with the groups that I’m referring to, I know that there is a big say in styling and their preference is to dress xyz way (although sometimes styling just sucks), and they have always been beautiful/handsome! The problem is that I think even if fans don’t realize it, they have this underlying bias with said idol(s) being ‘bigger’ (whether it’s plus size or just by kpop standards, etc. and there’s nuance pertaining to actual health as well). I feel like it sounds harsh, but I think there are a lot of fans that ‘stan’ out of pity aka maybe the odd man out or different for xyz reason. And I don’t even necessarily mean that in this case - I mean the influx of commentary particularly rampant when there is a clear change physically? It’s just something I’m noticing a lot right now and I don’t love it. submitted by /u/whyOwhy299 [link] [comments]

TW : CONTAINS D3ATH !! It's odd how these 2 brothers who were sm trainees both 0*fed themselves on the same day ... why does noone talk about them They were 2 people selected during sm auditions out of 3000 people . They were rumoured to be members to super junior but didn't debut and in 2010 they both p*ssed away on the SAME day . They were raised by a single mother in Toronto and are burried in torronto ... It's REALLY shady how noone till now have even tried to investigate this matter . How did 2 young men who were training to be idols do thus to themselves and WHY . This is deeply saddening What are your theories ? submitted by /u/parksaerom [link] [comments]

A lot of you have this mindset in regards to mature/sexy concepts that: 1. All adult/“sharp” featured idols have to do sexy concepts 2.the idols from the past who did it wanted to 3. that no minors were ever forced to it in the past 4. its ok as long as they’re all “adults” 5. It’s normal to constantly remind an idol and their fans they would look better sexy/mature Point 1 often comes up when an older idol is put or (as the narrative goes) forced into a more relaxed or cutesy concept. You get “they should be in a concept that fits them!” “Waiting for all the members to turn 18+” but can y’all hear yourself? So they can be forced into age appropriate concepts but you constantly reminding them they should do something else and plotting on other members to do the concept isn’t forceful? You look at an idol who did good in one edgy performance and suddenly it’s impossible for them to experiment? Why must they be forced into what you believe is good for them? You do not know these idols and what they are comfortable with but because they look a certain way a lot you act like they must be presented as such. Whenever K-pop and its flaws are discussed something people never fail to do is romanticize and spread a narrative that 1st and 2nd gen were safe for idols. This more obvious when talking about sexy concepts. A video of MissA’s mini skirt, a comment saying “why does no one do concepts like this anymore” a reply “cause no one debuts adults anymore”. The missA maknae was 17 at the time of the release. Park jiyoon turned 18 and was made to unknowingly perform a song she did not know the sexual meaning of. The 9muses members did not willingly participate in their groups sexy concept. I’d argue that all idols in a time of unfair idol contracts these people did not willingly participate in sexy concepts. They were probably forced,coerced and lied to. Idols who had just turned 18 would be forced to film inappropriate concepts and people would pass it of as fine because well she’s an adult! Sexy concepts do not become acceptable because everyone is of legal age. Consent exist for a reason. Age does not permit anyone’s entertainment to force them into the role of a sex symbol or innuendo filled songs and mvs. Nor do they need their “fans” constantly forcing the idea they have to be sexy. How would you feel if you were on stage doing quite well in a cute concept but instead of praise or admiration at your versatility and skill you get constant comments from the same people refusing to let go of the fact that you are not doing a sexy/mature concept? This whole post came from the hate yunah is facing. It seem impossible for a 20 yr old to be cute in a lot of your eyes. So she has sharper features will you deny she has good stage presence and does well in illit stages? Her fancams “sexy concept” “wasting her talent” She has never made any comments about her not liking her groups concept she said she enjoys it. So why is so impossible for her to enjoy her work without the label of “sexy” and “mature” being forced on her? And like I said before you don’t know what she’s comfortable with. Is it every idol who wants to dance be sexy? Is it every idol who hates being cute? If this is messy to bad I was ranting submitted by /u/Royal_Land_7344 [link] [comments]

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I used to think netizenbuzz was bad but pannchoa and their commenters have absolutely no morals. Sick people who have to be put away in a mental institution yet they somehow think they have some moral highground. Honestly wish someone would just hack and take it down permanently because some of the stuff I've read there is revolting. submitted by /u/Old_Temperature_1926 [link] [comments]

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Sometimes I think about it randomly, which group do you think rest 5 NCT dream members go to except Haechan since he is part of NCT 127. I think Chenle and Rejun will join WayV. I think Jeno, Jaemin and Jisung would join NCT 127 or they join NCT Wish. What do you guys think? submitted by /u/animejerk7763 [link] [comments]

I remember their debut, which maybe Im misremembering, but a lot of people were disappointed by Black Mamba. Me personally, I thought it was a cool song and the music video and concept was really cool. For the time it was released, it felt fresh and new. I was excited for what was to come for Aespa. Through Next Level and Savage, I was absolutely loving what they were giving. I’m one of those people that think Savage is their best work to this day (so maybe I’m being a bit biased). Then after that…Girls came, I didn’t really like it but the concept and everything was still making sense. Since then I feel like the quality in Aespa’s music has really dropped, and the whole concept behind them makes no sense to me anymore. I am not a die hard Aespa stan, so I’m not really caught up with the “lore” or whatever is going on in Kwangya, but as a casual listener, I don’t really know what I’m getting with them anymore. That being said, I absolutely LOVED Supernova, possibly my favourite K-Pop release of 2024. Armageddon was pretty good too, but the rest of the album sucked to put it quite frankly. And I find that is a reoccurring trend with Aespa, the bsides are either always mid or just downright dreadful. I feel like this can’t be just a matter of my personal taste, and others feel this way too. Every SM group has made sense to me. Especially concept wise, Red Velvet and NCT for example, they are consistent, they make sense. AESPA DOESN’T MAKE SENSE TO ME! Is there something I just don’t get at all about this group? submitted by /u/Illustrious_Ad_9649 [link] [comments]

I need advice on this but I don't know who to ask since this is a sensitive subject. I have a stan account of one of my ult biases from one of the kpop groups that I stan. So I usually keep up with him alot, his activities, schedule and even fansites for pictures and videos to share on my account. I also keep up with "protect idol name" twitter accounts that flag and report saseang tweets and rumors to make sure I also report them and protect him. One day I saw that one of these accounts had doxxed his private instagram account and other information but the tweet was immediately reported and removed. I never believe these things but I went ahead and searched it on insta to see if there was validity to it and it was true, it was his insta. His followers checked out with people from his staff and his close friends. I was so angry he was doxxed but I didn't think anything of it as it seemed he wasn't affected by it. Fast forward months later, I see on the "protect idol name" account that his name was mentioned in a kpop tea page of him allegedly drinking with high schoolers at a party with another idol from a different kpop group. I couldn't believe it because he's so busy but when I read the article, he had mentioned being friends with this idol and recently hanging out with him before, so I kinda got worried. The girls that shared it named him specifically but I take rumors with a grain of salt if there is no solid proof. I wanted to check if his personal insta was following this idol and he wasn't but it was actually his account that was gone. He must've deleted it after this article came out. And for those wondering, no I didn't have his insta saved but my stomach dropped when I heard the name of the idol he was with because he had just mentioned hanging out with him on livestream. I take stuff like this seriously, I would hate if my bias is out here doing illegal things while we're all fawning over him. It would be devastating to us, the fans and to the group. So now fast forward to a few days ago, I'm on one of the influencers pages that I follow because I love her content(he used followed her too) and I accidentally clicked on her followers and the very first username was the same name as the insta he had deleted. I was like isn't this his account name? And I clicked it and it was same name but different amount of followers so I'm guessing he switched accounts or made a new one. So when I clicked it, it said private but below it, it showed suggested accounts. I clicked on one and it was a girl in middle school, that the account followed. Then I clicked another account and another and they're all in middle school and high school and they all follow that account back. I was shocked. I genuinely want to think that I'm reaching and that it's not him but my gut feeling is telling me it's him. I have no proof to say something but all this lines up with him and the things that he says. I've never noticed before but now I'm starting to connect the dots. So since I have no actual proof it's him should I ignore all this or should I just un-stan just incase? Ever since I saw this I haven't a had a good feeling about this at all. I've been wrong before so that's why I feel like I should just let it go. But in the back of my mind I can't stop thinking, if my ult bias is a predator and if I'm supporting him I would never forgive myself. And as a disclaimer, I just want to say that this is all alleged and speculation. I can't say the idols name because this is too serious of an accusation and I would hate to be wrong and unnecessary hate fall on him. I'm sharing this here because I have no one to ask and it's eating me up inside. I am feeling conflicted about this because it could be true or it could just be me overthinking things and making something out of nothing. Also, everything that I found was pure coincidence, I wouldn't know his socials unless that saesang had shared it and me finding it again was just pure coincidence. I've explained it as best as I could. I'm not interested in idol's personal lives, I'm more interested in group activities and events like comebacks, concerts, etc. I have defended this idol and this group with all of my heart and for the first time I'm considering leaving kpop altogether. submitted by /u/Middle-Feed-6162 [link] [comments]

I get that as fans we want our favorite groups to have all the success and recognition they deserve, but sometimes it feels a bit too much and honestly kind of annoying. What’s even more strange is that most of the groups are already some of the most popular ones, so I don’t really get it. And sometimes it’s not even the actual fans of the group doomposting, so why are they so worried about the group’s success in the first place? Then there’s also the case of groups that have just debuted and fans already expect them to be the next big sensation. I admit that K-pop is a very competitive and fast-paced industry, but I don’t think it’s healthy to expect a group to be instantly super successful. There are so many artists around the world who started out small and only got recognized with time, why not let kpop groups also have the time to build their identity and prove themselves? And when it comes to groups that may have already reached their “peak,” I can understand why fans want them to become even more popular, but I also think sometimes we need to accept that our favorite group won’t always be number one. But some people also need to understand that after a peak if the fanbase is not constantly growing very fast it's not a downfall if there is still a big and loyal core fandom. Longevity is better that instant virality. I honestly think this mentality is part of the reason why so many groups debut and keep coming back so quickly. It’s because they need to stay relevant as fans move on as soon as the hype dies down. I also think doomposting plays a role in groups losing hype. People act like a comeback or debut that isn’t well received defines the group’s entire career. As a result, casual K-pop fans form a negative impression and stop paying attention, which is a shame. submitted by /u/Technical_Walrus9158 [link] [comments]

Hello everyone!! I’m thinking of buying the together package for day 1 of Newark and was wondering if anyone with the same package would wanna go together? I would be going solo and would love a friend to be with during the concert! I’m 21F btw. Thanks y’all! Btw if anyone wants a friend to go with and is thinking of buying in a different section then I would totally be down to buy a different section together as well! :) submitted by /u/FarNeighborhood4025t [link] [comments]

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